Jesus Christ: A Big White Lie

by: Kidman J. Williams

We all know him.  Jesus Christ was our Lord and savior…right?  Well, that has to remain hearsay.  The technology just isn’t there yet to determine whether he was a deity of any kind or if Jesus was just another Bible-banger on a street corner yelling with a Nachal Alexander turtle shell on his head.

There are many questions that surround the “Son of God.” One of these questions and the biggest question next to him being a deity is…what fucking color was Jesus of Nazareth?  This is one of the questions I think that we have a handle on.  I’m pretty sure that people aren’t dumb enough to suspect that Jesus was some white stud looking like he should be on a Lynyrd Skynyrd album cover.

Credit: Popular Mechanics

I think that it has been proven that Jesus looked like everyone else in the region at the time; this is why Judas had to point Jesus out to the authorities.  He looked just like everyone else in the crowd.  Jesus was darker skinned.  He had hair of “sheep wool” and more than likely he had a beard.Throughout the years, much like Michael Jackson, the face of Jesus got whiter and whiter.  The bone structure differed and I know they didn’t have plastic surgeons back then.  So, who is the white guy that people keep passing off as The King of Kings?

Who Is the White Jesus?

There are many historians who point to Cesare Borgia as the honky Jesus.  Given the history of those times, it would make a lot of sense.  Cesare Borgia was the son of Pope Alexander VI; one of many children fathered by the Holy Father.

Cesare Borgia was a ruthless military leader who was in fact at war with the Jewish people and the Muslims.  It is said that Cesare Borgia was modeled to be the white Jesus by his father, Pope Alexander VI.

I would hope that you would be asking yourself, “Why Kidman?  Why would they model Jesus after a violent military leader?”

It is a rudimentary idea that we see all the time in the present day ladies and gents!  Propaganda!  Yes, the ugly word that makes men and women do despicable things that they never thought possible.  All for the entertainment of rich men to watch and make bets on their winner with the lives and blood of the innocent.

At the time his son, then Cardinal Cesare Borgia, was to be made the cracker Jesus the people didn’t much care for the war against the Israelites and the Muslims because they were the same color as their Messiah.  You can’t kill people who look similar to your own Messiah!

Pope Alexander, along with the commissioning of the white Jesus paintings, had all depictions of Jesus with darker skin destroyed to ensure people would be behind their selfish cause.  Here is a quick side note: Leonardo Da Vinci was one of the first artists to push this propaganda image of the pretty white boy Jesus.

But Is This The Whole Truth?

Left: Borgia, Right: Jesus

When you look closely at the pictures of the Cardinal Cesare Borgia and Jesus side-by-side you will see the similarities quickly.  What you will also notice are the harsh differences in the two of them.  That is a veracious fact.

When you examine closer, Borgia is very stern in his appearance.  You can really feel the asshole in his paintings.  When you look at Jesus you can see the honest, caring and loving eyes of The Christ.  There is nothing that says I’ll hang you by your genitals in Jesus’ eyes.  He cares and loves you unconditionally and you really feel it, like you would from your own mother.

What I am alluding to is that maybe Jesus was not modeled after the cardinal.  Maybe, just maybe, he was modeled after a woman.  The woman that he may have been modeled after is Lucrezia Borgia, the sister to Cesare Borgia and illegitimate child of Pope Alexander VI.

Lucrezia Borgia, according to history and paintings, was quite a striking and kind looking woman.  There are many horrible things in her history.  Her brother, Cesare may have killed her brother.  Cesare married a woman of France, forcing her to divorce her second husband Alfonso of Aragon, the 17 year old Duke of Bisceglie and the son of the late King of Naples.  This marriage between Cesare and his new bride would destroy a political union between France and Rome.

Later it would be known, but not proven, that Cesare once again intervened and changed her life forever.  Cesare killed Alfonso for political reasons.  She was also forced to give up her and Alfonso’s son Rodrigo.

Lucrezia Borgia
Lucrezia Borgia

Lucrezia Borgia went down in history as a nefarious woman with damnable intents.  There have been many ideas that she was a murderer who used poison to kill her enemies.  None of that was proven and most of it came from her first husband who was run off by her Father, the Pope.  Some say that her Father and her had an incestual love affair which is why he ran her first husband off and tried to label him a limp-dick.  This sparked the ex to go around screaming rumors about her and slandering her name.

Her subjects looked at her as a kind leader with a heart of gold.  They also saw her as a gentle mother to her family.

In my opinion, the only thing that she had done in her life that could be viewed as an evil act was against her ego driven brother, the heinous Cesare Borgia; the very man who killed her beloved brother and her 2nd husband.

 Revenge for Lucrezia Borgia?

The theory that I have come up with is not new, but it is the most plausible. Revenge would be something that I would seek out if my brother killed people I loved, forced me to get a divorce, and made me give up my only child.

It is very known that Leonardo Da Vinci had a working relationship with Cesare Borgia as a military engineer.  We also know that Da Vinci was one of the first to make the boldly pale Jesus Christ in the image of Cesare.  Yes he was that egomaniacal!

What we see is the bold differences between Jesus and Cesare.  Like I had hinted to earlier, the images of the “Cesare Jesus” pictures have an almost womanly quality.  Cesare was very cold looking.

Lucrezia had colluded with Leonardo himself!  I KNOW!  That is a bold statement isn’t it?  That comes with one simple question.  How do you hurt a man who is seemingly so coldhearted that he can’t be touched with a pair of gloves?  You crush his ego!  You destroy the one thing that makes that person tick. The ONLY thing that he truly loves.

Lucrezia colluded with Da Vinci to make herself the image of Jesus with the explicit idea to get back at her ruthless brother for destroying her family.  Leonardo Da Vinci went right along with this plan because he worked for Cesare and knew just how ungodly the man truly was.

Take a look at these pictures and tell me, “Kidman Williams you are an idiot, you are a mad man and a heretic!”


Try to tell me that I am totally off though!

Those pictures are just to give you an idea.  Now, I’m going to lay it on thick nonbelievers!

When you look at Lucrezia, Cesare and Da Vinci’s painting, “The Head of Christ” you will see exactly what I mean.

Da Vinci's "Head of Christ"
Da Vinci’s “Head of Christ”

Why shouldn’t Leonardo Da Vinci make her Jesus Christ in his pictures?  It isn’t like Da Vinci didn’t know about Cesare’s horrible plans.  Everyone knew about him murdering her husband despite the protective services of the Vatican.  Everyone knew that Cesare had killed their brother to ensure his status in the family and in rank.  Yeah, he was a real shitty sibling!

Bonus Material: The Last Supper

When you look at the “Last Supper,” you see what we have all been told.  There is a woman sitting to the right of Jesus.  People were told this based on the idea that the separation makes the symbol for woman.

What if that wasn’t the woman at all?  Maybe Da Vinci put that in to show the big and subtle middle finger to Cesare Borgia.  Jesus in the Last Supper has the very same look as Lucrezia.

The Last Supper
The Last Supper

I may even go as far to say that Lucrezia just might have been “Mona Lisa,” but that would be a whole other article full of research, time and a lot of effort to bring that to light.

Just remember that when it comes to your governing bodies…there is a really good chance that they are not only fucking you, but they are fucking each other as well.