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The Internet Just Raped My Brain
By: Coach Dan The internet. What was once a marvel of modern civilization has quickly deteriorated into a hub for perverts, dope fiends, crooks, and cats. The Uneducated Elite, who in the past was resigned to sitting on their trailer steps and guzzling Bud Light by the quart while they […]
Story Girls
By: Michael Chin Jackson and Lily went to St. Peter’s because their father wanted to steer them from the bad influences of a public high school. He told them getting an education was not about smoking in bathrooms or fist fights or winding up pregnant before graduation. Jackson knew the […]
Johnny Sin: Album Review
Review by: Kidman J. Williams Johnny Sin is a punk rocker from the mean cow patties of Wisconsin. Yes the cheese state. Sin’s sleazy guitar and hilarious lyrics propel the album in what can only be described as a fifteen day rum bender walking out of a dirty men’s room […]
The History of Auld Lang Syne (The New Years Eve Song)
By: Kidman J. Williams The year was 1788 when Robert Burns, a Scottish poet with the sensibility of a true entrepreneur took to the Scots Musical Museum and said, “Oi, you there! Did you know that nobody owns the rights to Auld Lang Syne?” The man behind the counter looked […]
Pints of Porter
A backpackers’ haven Open all day every day Sydney’s hedonism The distinct smell of human vomit Filling his lungs without aversion But rather, nostalgia and a smile The play continues As the bouncer of middle-eastern extraction Try’s to charm two girls from Scotland with the goal as clear as ever […]
Almost-Rape, American Tourists, and Pope Garbs
by Teddy Fuentes The Mexican Dream: Almost Getting Raped, American Asshole Tourists, and Nostalgia Dressed in Pope Attire. I was inside a home. This place was downtrodden but very enticing. White walls now a cream color. Brown stains like cigarette smoke made art, staining glass never meant to be seen […]
The Doors First Album and Mary Werbelow: 50 Years on
by Kyle K. Mann (Note: A Nov. 15, 2017 update is included at the bottom. This article first appeared in GonzoToday.com on Dec. 30, 2016.) January 4, 1967: Imagine it. It’s a new year, and there is some amazing music floating around, like nothing we had ever heard before. A […]
Way Beyond Weird
photo credit: Ms. Gonzo “America is not a young land: it is old and dirty and evil. Before the settlers, before the Indians… the evil was there… waiting.” — William S. Burroughs by Kyle K. Mann It seems to me that the USA has been mad – stark barking mad […]
“We are stuck in the age of Scandalous rage”
by Topix Hayes Mad Scientist and scientific hate. We are stuck in the age of Scandalous rage. Caged, Enraged, Nothing will stop the rock of the Cool man’s cock, While he gently rockin us Splittin us, Rapin us, Then thanking you and me As he wipes his dick […]
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