In between days…

By David C. Phillips

I’m addicted to myself.  Most people I know are.  Whether it’s the moments, the trips or the cars, most people are.  It’s roughly 3 am on a Saturday morning and I randomly selected a record to write to.  It feels like I’ve had 8 Jamesons and a few beers, because that’s what I may have wanted.  I think as though I also may have had a few one-hitters on the way home as well but the only thing I’d rather do is…I don’t really know.  I’m in between days but I still choose myself over anything.  Just in the now as most of way today was serving others in some capacity so shove your self-righteous thoughts up your ass.

Yes, dolts, that’s a Cure song that happened to be off the first record I grabbed but don’t get all emo heady on me.

Americans, and I’m no exception, are addicted to themselves more than most.  Moved on from The Cure to The Violent Femmes, because you care, but it’s out of control and I’m certainly part of the problem.  Maybe ‘part of the problem’ is harsh, as I’m telling you all how much we all suck, but fuck it.  As we all know I’ve been around.  The things I’ve told you already are true as far as the world is concerned.  They’ve all centered on personal stories and whatever you got out of them is on you.  I like pen to paper and loath the transfer into a digital medium but fucking 1st world problems, right?  I like to hear myself talk, I like to tell stories, I like to listen to music before anyone and shove in their face when they finally discover it as I’m really that much cooler.  Fuck that and fuck you.  Those thoughts run through every addicts mind apparently.  ‘I’m too busy’ is the worst and most shit thing anyone can ever say and we’ve all done it.

Why do I tell you this?  Well, do you listen to yourself?  I don’t normally.  ‘You should just go home’ says the brain.  All the while the gut and junk say ‘You should do as much of everything as you can!!  YOLO douchebag!’  The struggle is real.  It happens to everyone of us and depending on who you listen to may decide your ‘fate’.

Believe in fate?  Without a doubt.  Do I agree with ‘fate?  No asshole…you don’t get that choice.  I’m not sure why I’m all wound up…could likely be the vocals of Gordan Gano, but I was wound up before the music found me.  Don’t shoot shoot shoot that thing at me.

Addiction is a real fucking beast.  Whether you shoot junk, zombie out on pills, eat yourself to death, or just drink like most of the globals…get ahold of yourself.  Maybe ‘you’ is me and we all need a look towards the inside from an outside perspective.  Maybe ‘me’ is you.  We’re all addicted to ourselves to some capacity, no escaping it.  Embrace it, get over it, or fuck off.  Maybe ‘we’ is me…I’m David and I’m addicted to myself.

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