Editorial: Kim Jong Fat, Kim Jong Pow, Kim Jong Dead.

There has been a lot in the media lately regarding North Korea, and I occasionally binge feed on it for several hours at a time. It is a bitter business, all information fed through a dozen layers of propaganda and ignorant know it all’s. Most of it gibberish. All of it terrible.

But what to make of it? How does all of this unpleasant apocalyptic jargon and all of these funny caricatures come together in a meaningful way? Can a prediction be made? Can any sense come of it all?

I’ve been thinking and talking about it for some time, and I’ve had a fascination with the DPRK for over a decade, and I think unlike many other Hot Points of 2017, a majority of Americans understand we have a shared problem and we all stand pretty firmly on one side of it. The real question is how.

The unfortunate flaws of our current leadership bear less on my greatest concerns than do the ominous potentialities of what this may all mean below the waters.

Why is Kim Jong-Un acting this way? What does the North have to gain from prolonged, escalating antagonization of the United States? What is the end-game?

Is it simply just mutual deterrence?

This has generally been the stance taken by the Kim’s regardless of the field of military advancement, but the fat little bastard supposedly hasn’t even figured out how to screw an atom bomb onto his Fat Jong Kim, Big-Boy carrying shit-rockets, and now he is exploding thermonuclear devices and triggering earthquakes that terrify the Chinese neighbors?

 

Maybe he is entirely a lunatic, but there may be something more afoot than mere mental illness. He sure does have a big pair of balls right now to have such tiny little cock and nutsack. He obviously thinks he has friends somewhere- and maybe not just in China.

Russia and Iran also enjoy trade relations under the table. China has provided the cash, Russia provided the tech and Iran is an eager buyer on the North Korean Kim Jong Pocket Rocket Market.

All three have a vested interest to keep North Korea in play as a destabilizer for the west, and a sleight of hand to keep us looking at one problem instead of the other.

If such an alliance is indeed forming in terms of active manipulation of Kim Fat-Bum and his giant army of brainwashed cult maniacs, then our first order of business should be to shake it all up. Not with bombs. With Candy.

I’m not sure who sabotaged our relationship with Russia by creating the Trump-Russia scandal, but soured relations with Russia is a real bummer right now for Team America. It might have been Putin himself who proliferated the rumors, or even China for that matter-in the interest of not losing its influence over the Northern Bear through strengthed Trump-Putin ties. There are a number of potential players here, maybe even Julian Assange in some sort of egomaniacal blood vengeance against the incoming president.

Either way, bad ties with Russia is not good for business at a time like this. Putin just wants his cock stroked and Donald Trump has soft hands, so this really shouldn’t be that big of a problem- and it wouldn’t be if a majority of our country weren’t composed of high functioning educated retards.

Most people just act as organic amplifiers of every dumb TV signal that comes down the wire, feeding into the hysteria until they foam at the mouth and start beating up other Americans with bicycle locks.

In addition to our need for warming relations with Russia, it won’t serve our interests to use negative enforcement on a trade ally like China.  Especially when it has the third largest military power and Russia the second. What we need with China is the carrot-on-a-stick method. Something to dangle in front of them that they value more than Kim.

Like North Korea itself maybe? A massive production capacity, industrious people, all the lucrative potential of South Korea ready for them in the North? Or another puppet family? One more in line with the Chinese authority and friendlier to the U.S. and its allies. New trade agreements or joint projects? There are people who are well paid to know exactly what everyone wants, so it’s high time we conceded to give a little. This is honorable, dignified strategy. If you are going to run an empire, you might as well do it correctly.

We should be expanding our economic ties with Russia and China right now rather than isolating them from ourselves through threats of sanctions; driving them right into the embrace of their own strengthened alliances against us. It is counter-productive to our interests. It’s time to start getting serious about making good deals with the Russians and the Chinese, where we all make some money and we all get to flex a little sovereignty.

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We will always be safer when we are interdependent and not isolated. It was this premise that brought Reagan and Gorbachev to the table again and again until they finally got it right. Fear through lack of trust and communication had led to isolation to the point of paranoid panic on both sides. Trust and Verify. This is the way forward.

The more ominous possibility here is that both Russia and China are secretly escalating the North Korean situation to eminent war for the exact purpose of war with the U.S. but let us hope that is not the case. Even so, all the more reason to try to keep our potential enemies close while we still can.

The most likely and favorable solution for all sides, under the right mutual conditions?

Kim Jong Dead.

It’s time to release the potential of the North Korean people, free of the bonds of brutal starvation, torture, and tyranny.