By: Kidman J. Williams It has been confirmed that The original lineup of the Smashing Pumpkins will be getting back together. The Smashing Pumpkins were an important piece of the 90’s Alternative scene when they released Gish in 1991. By the time Siamese Dream hit they were bonafide rock stars. […]
By: Coach Dan The internet. What was once a marvel of modern civilization has quickly deteriorated into a hub for perverts, dope fiends, crooks, and cats. The Uneducated Elite, who in the past was resigned to sitting on their trailer steps and guzzling Bud Light by the quart while they […]
art by Joey Feldman by Joseph Seiss It’s only been a month since the election and I’ve already begun the grim slide into a whole new world of psychotic behavior. All of a sudden my worst fears are a sobering reality. No more jokes. Donald Trump has brutally murdered fun […]
by Ashley Beth For through teeth grinding is the way we come in And with teeth grinding is the way we go out And if and only if The only times we truly live Our teeth are grasping all the air In us to shout? I was flying 38,000 […]
by Kyle K. Mann They make the drinks strong at Abuelitas Mexican Restaurant, and halfway into the first Bloody Mary I forgot which team jersey color was which in the Patriots-Seahawks game. Not that it mattered that much as I was merely watching occasionally in hopes of seeing my […]
by Mark Linnhoefer ‘Fuck.’ was my first thought as my alarm rang at an atrocious volume. I had set it so I wouldn’t miss the results of this shitfest of an election. The notion that any vote in essence comes down to choosing between a Giant Douche and a […]
A PERSONAL MESSAGE FROM THE GONZO TODAY PUBLISHER- words & art by Clayton Luce For those of you feeling a punch in your gut that “you are out of touch and living in a bubble,” go with your gut. You were. For those of you feeling victorious, you are next […]
By: Kidman J. Williams I used to love Saturday morning cartoons. I couldn’t wait to wake up, go out into the kitchen and get myself a heaping bowl of Apple Jacks and park my Under Roos clad booty in front of the television to watch all my favorite shows of […]
By: Heathcote Williams The total obscenity of the American Dream Comes to fruition in Donald J. Trump: “We need a leader that wrote ‘The Art of the Deal.’ ” He declares on his Presidential stump. What’s wrong is that Trump’s best-selling volume, On the virtues of property speculation, Wasn’t written […]
By: Donnie Casto II Most ardent liberals and progressives who continue to ride the DNC paradigm after facts show they sabotaged Bernie’s campaign for Hillary. These individuals are committed to statism and Hillary’s principles: lie, distract, deny, and deceive. 10 QUESTIONS for Hillary and her supporters (1). When […]
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